"Sometimes I just want to lay in bed and wait until someone does the dishes, the laundry, the breakfast but then I remember that that's my jam & by choosing selflessness, I am really choosing love...."
God has molded me in many ways through this sanctification process called marriage. But the one thing that has stuck out to me in this first year that my husband and I have been joined together has been the selflessness of a true, Christ-focused marriage.
I have seen numerous selfless acts done through my husband for me. I have watched his heart mold into looking more like Christ’s. I have been hurt, joyful, confused, blissful, angry, & molded myself. So many things happen when we choose to be selfless or choose not to be selfless.
When I intentionally choose to be selfless, through the power of Jesus in me, my husband and I grow closer together, intimately & more known.
When I choose to be stubborn, rude, quick to speak, & quick to be angry, that is causing a riff between the intimacy my husband and I could experience. My actions do that. Me.
The same happens when my husband chooses his ways over mine, or ours. It happens to all of us because all of us are sinful.
It’s so unnatural to put someone first. Yet, marriage requires us to put our spouse in front of our own self.
Just as Christ bids man to come and die in order to follow Him, we must come & die to our selfish desires in our marriages so that we may flourish & grow, together and with God.
It takes power & strength, boldness & love to intentionally, selflessly, put to death my selfishness & walk in the selflessness that Christ calls me to.
When my husband wants something that I do not want, I must choose selflessness.
When my husband has been feeling unloved & I just want to go to sleep, I must die to my selfishness & choose selflessness.
When I don’t want to get up in the morning to make my beloved husband breakfast, I must put aside my selfish desires & choose to walk in selflessness.
Even when my husband is being selfish & I have the prime opportunity to be selfish right back, I must stop & intentionally choose Jesus’s way, selflessness.
How do we choose selflessness?
With God’s help, Jesus’ power ALONE. I, Katie, cannot be selfless without the help of the Father. Without His strength, His Holy Spirit working through me, I will choose selfishness time & time again.
We must walk & talk with God daily in order to walk & talk the way of selflessness.
It is by His strength & graciousness to us that we will live selflessly in our marriages, in our lives.
Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. (Proverbs 3:3-6 ESV)